Chuck Norris looks up to Bill Barnes

Meet Bill Barnes

• Guns don't kill people. Bill Barnes kills People.
• There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Bill Barnes allows to live.
• Bill Barnes does not sleep. He waits.
• The chief export of Bill Barnes is Pain.
• Bill Barnes has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
• The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Bill Barnes 3. Cancer
• Bill Barnes doesn't go hunting.... Bill Barnes GOES KILLING
• When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Bill Barnes.
• Bill Barnes doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
• Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Bill Barnes.
• Bill Barnes is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
• Bill Barnes counted to infinity - twice.
• When Bill Barnes does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
• Bill Barnes’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
• Bill Barnes doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
• Bill Barnes gave Mona Lisa that smile.
• Bill Barnes can slam a revolving door.